


Of Stupid Hammers (Not You, Mjolnir, You're Great)

by KassandraScarlett



Series: MCU Rare Pair Bingo-2K19 [11]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Attempted Kidnapping, BAMF Natasha Romanov, BAMF Tony, F/M, First and last time I use that tag, Natasha Romanov & Tony Stark Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 17:21:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20429633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KassandraScarlett/pseuds/KassandraScarlett
Summary: It's never a good idea to kidnap an Avenger, let alone two.





	Of Stupid Hammers (Not You, Mjolnir, You're Great)

**Author's Note:**

> Square: Unwilling Suspension

“Really now, you could have just asked,” Tony drawled. “I mean, I would have refused, but it would have saved a lot of hassle.”

“You talk too much for a man strapped to a chair with his hands tied behind his back,” their kidnapper commented. “Or have you forgotten the danger you are in?”

Tony shrugged as best as he could in the position he was. “I laugh in the face of dang- no, hold on.” His eyes got a faraway look. “Sorry, no, that’s the Lion King. But you get my point.”

“Tony,” Natasha growled.

He looked away from Hammer, smiling up at where she was suspended upside down over a chasm. “Hey, honey. Glad to see you’re awake.”

“I've been long enough to hear you start chatting,” she groaned. “Will you please be a little quicker?”

Hammer snarled. “You two shut up. Right the fuck now. Anthony...” He turned to the billionaire. “You either give me the codes to SI's servers, or your pretty little girlfriend falls a couple hundred feet.”

Tony sighed, theatrical as ever, making Natasha feel equal amounts of annoyance and endearment. “Alright,” he grumbled. “Come closer, I'm just gonna whisper it to you.”

_Stupid man_, Natasha thought to herself as Hammer leaned close to Tony.

This time, Tony barely wasted a second. His hands flew up to box Hammer's ears, making him howl in pain and jerk away. 

“First rule of kidnapping, Justin,” he chided, untying his feet with deft fingers and standing up. “Tie their hands where you can see them.”

Hammer didn’t have a chance to do anything more than whimper before Tony punched him, effectively knocking him out.

“Took you bloody long enough,” Natasha groused as Tony operated the mechanism to bring her over to solid ground, and then untying the cables around her.

“You okay?” He checked, peering into her eyes. “No dizziness from blood rush, no concussion?”

She nipped playfully at his fingers. “I'm fine. But you’re getting old. How long does it take to untie yourself from ropes?”

Tony scoffed. “Please, I was free almost two minutes after we were brought in here. I was messing with him and waiting for you.”

Natasha looked around the empty room. “Let me guess. The men are all outside?”

“Idiot sent everybody out, thought he wasn’t in any danger from us tied up.” He shot a nasty glare at Hammer’s unconscious form. “Still, made our getting free easier. You ready to take them on now?”

“Yep.” She nodded, getting to her feet as well. “You’re okay without your suit, right?”

Tony just grinned.

**Author's Note:**

> Who found the Dr Who reference???
> 
> My Tumblr: kassyscarlett


End file.
